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Couples remarry long before they have finished grieving their losses, worked through their issues or developed a healthy single lifestyle. Jeff and Judi Parziale A reader writes: My dad remarried recently to a woman he met four months after my mom's passing.I am 36, so part of me feels like I shouldn't be so childish about this--however--they are an extremely insensitive twosome.Your dad has been defined throughout your whole life through marriage to your mother, as father to you.Imagine how nerve-wracking and terrifying it must be to find yourself alone after many years of marriage, without a touchstone or witness to your life, all while mourning an immense loss, and try to have sympathy for your parent.And, if it helps you to grieve the loss of your mother to not meet this woman right now, I think you are entitled to that and should not have to meet her yet. But again, in my opinion I believe in order for you to grieve as you need to, then you do not have to meet this woman right now. And so none of us can say your father is doing it the right or wrong way - he has to do it his own way.Especially, who is to know if this relationship will even go anywhere yet? As a grieving widow, I've seen how so many of us handle things differently. I just hope he is doing it in a way that is fair to himself and the woman he is seeing...i can't help but feel that in some ways my dad moving on so quickly is disrespectful to my mom's memory, but i don't want to hurt his feelings either. Oh wow, that does seem like he started dating quickly...At just 2 months, I wonder how fair it is to that woman, as it seems doubtful your father even had time to fully grieve the loss of your mother yet. while your father has every right to do what he needs to do in order to get through this, I also believe you do as well.

He planned to rent a cottage in Michigan for the summer, planned to make more visits to Detroit to see his grandkids.

When one parent dies and the remaining parent begins dating or marries someone else, it can be very hard for the adult child to accept, no matter how soon after the death it occurs.

Partly that is because you may be feeling a need to remain loyal to your mother and respectful of her memory, and you may be worried that your father will cease to remember and love this irreplaceable person you both have lost.

Many individuals approach marriage, even remarriage, with a “let’s get married and work out the details later” attitude.

In fact, most remarrying couples have known each other less than 9 months.




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